untitled title.

i opened my eyes today.

monotony got me..

yesterday night opened up a plethora of platforms.. of vulnerability to some, of hardening of hearts to others. it was a moment of sticking together for what it's worth. what was it worth?

it's worth for the togetherness we all love. i love you guys.

*

i always tell myself this recently. it's time to get out of clubbing excessively, it's like an addiktion i can't stop, it eats up my insides if i don't go. surely there are better things t do over the weekend night.

let's try this.

and nothing stupid happened btw.

*

focus, focus, hocus pocus. training's down. and even if i have to see (ever so reluctantly) a peculiar entity every sat sun morning, i'll grit and roll my eyes. ha.

the saturday!

"aiya we're just superficial la"

*

here on a saturday afternoon is somewhat heartwarming, to be alone in my bedroom and just gazing around. i'm glad i finished most of my to-do stuff, like the IBP budgeting (big yay!).

gonna meet uncle Alan soon for some high tea, so whoopie, followed by dinner and drinks with ..

:) it's great to complete my saturday like this, especially after training.

speaking of which, i'm glad i started dragonboating. it's teamwork isn't it? similar to volleyball, and i get healthier.

pity i may have to stop if my condition worsens, but i'm glad CCWA gave me a chance. loves!

i don't really wanna blog much today. i'm just so tired.

PS: i'm a boy and we toy with your feelings. all boys do (: we're adulterous cheap sluts who sleep around even though we're attached.

and it's even more worse if he's boring and sleeps to get to the top. so much for being a himbo.

PSS: if you think i'm talking about myself, i'll leave you to decide. i call 'em like i see 'em

threes.

god, i'm so depressed. i'm gonna party tonight.

god, i'm so relieved. i'm gonna have fun tonight.

god, i'm so tired. i'm gonna relax tonight.

Top Favourite 3 tracks at the mo.

a friday.

why do most hot people have issues with being loyal and faithful to their other halves? is there some sort of stigma that grows with the good-looks hormone? that they can rage out of control and resist the all-too-significant info that "oh, i have a boyfriend already" or "oh, my boo's in the washroom"

yet, a message just arrived. and i melt. i'm such a fucking softie lar cb.

**

went for a medical review today and i didn't know my problem with my back was at detrimental and bad as this. when i heard the results, i swear, my heart dropped to the soles of my feet. i recall tearing on my way back to company line. it didn't just affect my mood, it could potentially affect the rest of my life. damn .

***


and welcome back mr flooder fan (: it's great to see my fans throwing at me such remarks, coz guess what? wild dogs don't bark at parked cars.

another day in paradise.

1 more day to book out day. and i guess you never thought things would end on a good note.

good riddance(?) is what i'll say.

feeling lifeless in camp is not good. so much i want to do, but time has to take its place. there's like a muzzle around my mouth in this day and age. i always felt like i belong in an era, say 10 years from now, where NS is hopefully abolished.

i seem to lack the literal touch in life, my thoughts are rather incoherent and almost dear-diary like. as i looked back (don't i always) into my archives, i see entries, entries of (non-self-obsessed) angst, passion about certain issues and moral rights. and now as i start mentally degrading myself serving the nation (oh, stop it with the thinking soldier, we're all made to chiong sua, even the clarks! look at those paper cuts), i feel that "memes" give me the satisfaction for the day.

it seems almost bastrial to just be led by emotions rather than principles and values. i consider myself nothing if i do not have the ability to express myself with fluency and zest in any medium possible.

---

in camp, there's so much time to let your mind wander that you start planning your weekend in advance. and when you have even MORE time, you plan them by the hours, and you start randomly SMSing people to book 'em. haha. or they sms-ing you to book you.

--

facebook has seemed to be gaining much popularity in the wake of the much-HTML-modified Friendster.com. It's network of universities and occupation/brands/company has made it look more official as a proper non-sleazy myspace.com like site.

however, what is with the many applications being added? it makes your profile look so cluttery and uninviting, and you have to scroll ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL the way down just to see the wall posts (after going through the how hot are you? the Vampires, the garden, the start system etc..) i'd wish they'd have a limit to the number of applications. and god, the diff between the pictures and the albums is like the diff between friendster's comments and testimonials.

it's literally the same! well, if you got a different opinion, fair enough. :p

---

i'm growing fat here in camp, thanks to my status (and when is the #!@#!@$% M.O coming back) i'm just sitting in lectures and computer labs letting my mind wander. How i await weekends, especially when the competition is nearing, i hope to contribute to the team :) let's do this!!